Soaring temperatures are the excuse for many things, Structured Products included, says NDF. But even before we could get to the success of the company’s latest product offerings on a press release issued at the end of last week, we were waylaid by an extraordinary array of food-based references that had us on our knees, praying for a new sub-editor – for they are the ones that provide the headlines that often hurt the most. Before we had got past the first 10 words of the press release, we were entertained by the opportunities of “sizzling offers”, and the company’s hopes to “curry” favour with intermediaries over the summer. Weakened not only by the thought of all of this food, and then again by the puns from these gents, we were then told that the April Growth Kick Out Plan was the “toast of the industry”. And after that came the details, which were a mere snack in relation to the many courses we had already consumed. Keep it simple and we will read further; baffle us with cod culinary promises and we may not, but thanks for trying.